Perception is more powerful than reality.
Let me explain…
Reality is reality. It is a fact. It is the truth that is objective, rational and indisputable.
On the other hand, perception is how you choose to interpret reality, your opinions. It is sometimes irrational, subjective and tainted by your prejudices and bias.
“Perception is more important than reality”.
Why else do you think big successful companies like Apple are very concerned about “Brand Management”?
They are because branding is all about reputation and reputation is all about the way people perceive you or your business. It is their perception of your worth as a business that will determine whether they buy from you or not.
If someone hates you with passion, do you know there is how you can use that hatred against him and convert the situation to your advantage using this knowledge?
Yes, it is possible. To help you understand how this is possible, I want you to digest the quote below:
Perception is more important than reality. If someone perceives something to be true, it is more important than if it is in fact true. This doesn’t mean you should be duplicitous or deceitful, but don’t go out of your way to correct a false assumption if it plays to your advantage. — Ivanka Trump
If someone is of the incorrect assumption or perception that something is, when in reality it is not, there is nothing you can do to convince him otherwise. The best thing to do is to play along and help him solidify his perceived reality.
Right from time immemorial, strong emotions like anger, hatred, sex drive and love have been sources of strength and weakness in human life. It is strength when logic is applied and weakness when logic is absent.
When someone passionately hates you for whatever reason, he is sending negative vibes your way. Naturally, he expects you to do same so that you both can sustain the vibes by feeding off each other’s hatred. Remember, in life, like poles attract.
But know this:
Playing by his rules is a trap. Every time you return hatred for hatred, you embolden your enemy and sabotage your chances to take advantage of the situation. You make yourself a FOOL who is easily influenced by someone’s tainted perception of reality about you.
So what do you do?
Instead of hating the person back and returning fire for fire, do the exact opposite.
Return love for hatred. Counter his created and perceived “enmity reality” with your own created “love perception”.
What this means is, create a perception that is contrary to his reality.
The reality is that he hates you (and you probably hate him back), while the perception is that you love him. He doesn’t have to know that you hate him, even if you do.
How do you achieve this?
Your strategy is to give him the perception that you love him by playing to his interests and ego. Find out what he likes. Treat him well. Speak well of him. Help him whenever you can. Support him openly and make him perceive that you are his biggest fan.
Instead of hating the person back and returning fire for fire, do the exact opposite.
Even the Holy Bible recommends the use of this strategy in dealing with your enemies.
“But I say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.
(Luke 6:27-28 NKJV)
Another portion says:
Therefore “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head.”
(Romans 12:20 NKJV)
What do you think are the “coals of fire”?
That is reality – the direct consequences that should naturally accompany his actions – what people call karma.
But the Bible advises you NOT to show him that reality. Rather give him the opposite – a perception that is completely contrary to the reality he is expecting.
By so doing, you disarm him, confuse him and neutralize the potency of his hatred by playing to his perception while at the same time working to advance your own interests and heaping coals of fire on his head in the background.
He won’t know what hits him when it happens. Brilliant, isn’t it?
Now, this is how coals of fire work: When the day of reckoning comes and you are called upon to justify your actions, you won’t have to talk much. It is your good works, the perception you created, that will serve to both vindicate you and condemn him. Then everyone will see him for the wicked, despicable person he is and praise you for the “saint” you are.
He will be completely defenceless, helpless and defeated in the face of the reality that despite your good works, you never really cared about him. All you cared about was appealing to his perception of reality.
This is not to mention the karma that still awaits him if he does not repent from his hatred.
By diligently following this strategy, you will ultimately win the battle and succeed in using his hatred against him. While you, on the other hand, will be going about your happy lifestyle devoid of hated, unforgiveness, grudge or any debilitating negative energy.
The good thing is that you may succeed in winning him over with your display of “perceived love” and get him to like you. If that happens, fine. You win. If it doesn’t happen, great. You will still win in the long term.
In summary, knowing how to understand the difference between reality and perception will help you manage people’s perception and use it to your advantage, whether in business or in your personal relationships.